DHARMA IN EVERYDAY LIFE

By Nhat Quan

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           As you know, when Buddhists take refuge in the Three Jewels, they always have the heart to keep the five precepts of lay Buddhists. One of the five precepts has the precept not to lie. The scope of lies has four areas:

- Lying is not telling the truth, if it happens, you say no. If it doesn't happen, you say yes.

- Spoken language means extra words, people say less but you make up a lot. It's not serious, you make it serious.

- Two-way tongue talk means that to this person, you speak ill of the other, to the other person to speak ill of this person.

- Saying evil words such as scolding, cursing...

Lying has four areas, and the karma of lying also has four areas, which are:

- Blind, deaf, dumb, and lisp.

This retribution can occur immediately after the creation of karma, or it may be a lifetime later called Karma for rebirth retribution. Or will form karma after many lives, it is called Future retribution karma. However, within the scope of the article, the benefits do not lie, please do not talk about the consequences later, but only focus on life. In life when you have lived unreal with others, and with yourself, you will never find the truth in life, let alone realize the truth. It is also very detrimental to your own health.

According to scientific researchers, you lie because you fear the consequences of telling the truth. When you make a mistake, you will try to hide the truth so that others don't see you as stupid, incompetent, or simply so that others don't take their anger out on you. Having you lie, or lie is to let people think that you know a lot of things, and are smart and polite. In addition, if you lie because you are afraid of being punished, or being denied personal benefits in life. Therefore, depending on the circumstances, you can use all sorts of excuses to cover up your sins. But did you know that lying has serious harm, first of all:

1. In terms of Health

As you know, your nervous system is closely related to the immune system in the body. All your activities, thoughts, consciousness, feelings, and emotions have a direct effect on your health. Simply put, your body will affect what you think and act on.

So when you lie, you will feel anxious and guilty because your body and mind are not at peace about a certain issue. During times of restlessness, the body will produce abnormal hormones such as:

- Cortisol and norepinephrine.

* Cortisol will reduce the production of endorphins ie happy hormones in the body while increasing blood sugar and weakening the immune system.

* Norepinephrine will stimulate the heart to beat faster and lead to high blood pressure.

In addition, scientific researchers also said that people who often lie are often anxious, physically and mentally weak, and easily lead to stomach ulcers, headaches, Insomnia, or paranoia…

Lies can be intentional or unintentional, for example: When you go to a relative's house to attend a party... And although you still know the party is not attentive, the food is not very good, when people come to ask you that:

- How was the party, how was the food?

And you will answer:

- Very attentive, very delicious.

Sometimes attentive and delicious, but sometimes because you want your loved ones to be satisfied, so you say it out loud. According to research, up to 85% of respondents lie about how they feel about the meal they just used. Perhaps you think:

- It's okay. Simply please your loved one.

However, problems will arise after these seemingly harmless lies. Small and petty lies don't bring you too much of a direct consequence, however, they cause indirect annoyances that you will suffer. Lying at a loved one's house like this is just one of many situations that you may encounter in life

You should know, if you don't like a person's behavior but don't want to offend that person, then you have to lie, and when you lie, you will have to endure these annoying actions forever. Likewise, if you don't want to work too hard but are afraid of being ridiculed by your boss or colleagues, you will forever be immersed in a mountain of work. Uncomfortable but still lying that you are fine, then you will have to deal with all of life's troubles alone.

In a way, small lies are quite harmless and don't have serious consequences. However, the harmlessness of small lies is only for the listener, and for the liar, the consequences of lies that seem harmless, but extremely harmful.

Indeed, you may find lying has a profound effect on your mind and spirit. These seemingly innocuous lies can give you stress and discomfort that last for a long time, strain your mind and lead to fatigue in your body.

It may be difficult, to tell the truth, because, in life, there are many things you don't want to reveal to others, even if they are your best friend, very close to you. However, scientifically speaking, telling the truth is very simple:

- To tell the truth, you just need to recall and tell about what happened.

Lying is completely different. Lying requires you to come up with a story, to let people imagine that you have lived the story. Hide the flaws in the story you've just come up with and match the story to what's going on around it so it seems real. So in a few short seconds, your brain has to work at full capacity to publish the lie and that's why you feel uncomfortable, and stressed every time you lie.

Not only stopping at these immediate reactions but lying again and again over a long period of time will cause tension to accumulate in your mind and make you more and more tired. While stress is not perfect proof that a person is lying, stress is still a manifestation of lying. Lying actually affects your body many times over. Sometimes, when you're relaxed and comfortable, you won't feel the tension that lies have built up in your brain, but it's still there waiting, lurking to hurt your mind every time. You enter the world of lies.

Lying is a bad habit and a disease of people today. Lying is also dishonesty, that action will gradually make you not be true to yourself, lose your reason, and will live in the falsehood of your own conscience. Lying habitually will become a habit that is very difficult to eradicate. Lying that people know is like you are isolated, no one wants to be close to you, which means that lying will make your reputation no longer. That is speaking according to human society. For Buddhism, lying is harmful in many ways:

- First, lying negatively affects social stability. Lying undermines that stability. Because, you can only live together in an atmosphere of mutual trust, trusting that, in communication, everyone tells the truth. If everyone is lying, it is a sign of the group's decline and disintegration.

- Second, on a personal level, lying has disastrous effects and a chain reaction. That is, one lie leads to another lie and another, even more, serious lie until you yourself are surrounded by a veil of lies created by you. Such a person is increasingly separated from the goal of liberation and enlightenment, falling more and more into the cycle of sin, which is difficult to remove. Once you have lived untruth with others, and with yourself, you will never find the truth, let alone realize the truth.

Once upon a time, when the Buddha taught Rahula to take a basin to set up water for the Buddha to wash his feet. Rahula obeyed the Buddha's instructions and carried into him a basin of clean water. When the Buddha finished washing his feet, he said to Rahula:

- Is this foot wash drinkable?

La Hau La said:

- Dear World-Honored One, this foot wash cannot be used for drinking.

Buddha taught:

A liar is like a foot wash that cannot be used for drinking.

The Buddha continued:

- O Rahula, please empty the basin of water.

Master Rahula followed the Buddha's instructions, and after pouring the water, brought the basin in.

Buddha asked:

- Can this pot be used to hold rice?

Master Rahula replied:

- World-Honored One, this pot cannot be used to hold rice.

Buddha taught:

- A liar is like an unusable foot basin.

Therefore, a person who breaks the precept and tells a lie is never considered a good person, and in terms of cultivation and attaining enlightenment, it is impossible to attain enlightenment. However, there are also cases, where you lie to save people or animals, and are not guilty. In the sutras, there is a story that the Buddha's predecessor was a monk, meditating in the forest. When the king and his soldiers went hunting, chasing the deer, when they reached the monk, they lost track. They came and asked the monk:

- Did you see the deer running in any direction?

The monk was silent, not speaking. The soldiers got angry, shouted, and dragged the monk before the king. The king repeated the above question, and the monk replied as follows:

- Great King, I am a spiritual practitioner, keeping the precepts is not allowed to lie and not to kill. If I say I don't see it, I'm lying, and I'm guilty of a crime. If I told the truth so that the Great King would kill the deer, I would break the precept to kill. Please forgive me and excuse me for answering this question. If the Great King arrests me, I am ready to die, but I cannot answer for the Great King.

But lying must also be careful, otherwise, you will lose yourself and no longer control your own mind. So it is better, if it is necessary to use means to save a certain situation, but remember not to let the means abuse. Therefore, it is best that you carefully practice your words of truth. Because in the Sutra of Ten Good Things the Buddha taught: People who cannot lie are eight beneficial things as follows:

1- Be respected by the world.

2- Every word is right, loved by people and by heaven.

3- The mouth is usually clean and smells like Udambara when speaking.

4- Often use gentle words to comfort sentient beings.

5-. Enjoy the pleasure as you wish, and the three karmas are pure.

6- Words are not sad, but also happy.

7- Respected words, obeyed by people and heaven.

8- Ultimate wisdom, no one can be better.

There are few people in this world who dare to acknowledge the truth and speak the truth. That's why many of you live with each other in the form of external lies, so it is very difficult to find a person who lives completely truthfully. Storytelling:

- Once upon a time, there was a king who lived a very benevolent and virtuous life, married only one queen, and had no concubines. The king and queen did not have any princes, but only one princess. The two discussed together to find a way to choose the future prince, in the school age from 12 to 18 years old to match their daughter. Because at this age, if they have a clear perception, know how to live honestly, know how to absorb the essence of life, and after they grow up, it will be possible to help people live happily and peacefully. Instead of following the custom of passing from father to son, or passing it on to his relatives, this king opened a new policy, choosing talented people in the spirit of democracy. Candidates who have the right to stand for election are students, after officially passing the first round of tests on carefully selected standards. Recruited to the final round, each child will be directly given flower seeds by the king, if they come to the grading day and have a beautiful flower pot, they will be selected as a prince and inherit the throne. who later became king.

So the news spread all over the country very quickly, anyone who wants to take the exam to be a prince should hurry up to participate if they passed the test of the first round and go to the king now to receive flower seeds. If the boy who takes care of fertilizing and watering has the most beautiful flower pot to offer to the king and queen, he will be chosen as a prince. To tell the truth, there has never been a special contest like this since ancient times, simply how to get a beautiful flower pot that the king himself gave the seed.

          Time has passed so quickly and the festival to enjoy beautiful flowers is almost here, many people wonder:

- Who will be the prince in the future?

And the festival day has come, and every flower pot is beautiful. Never before have people enjoyed the beauty of flowers like now, everyone was admiring their tongues of praise. It was difficult for the judges to choose the most beautiful flower pot because each pot has its own beauty. Every family hopes that their child will be the future prince. It is true that the beautiful flower contest has never been before, on this day the beauties and beautiful people have the opportunity to come to the capital to enjoy the brilliant colors of flowers. Everyone felt happy inside, and at the same time eagerly looked forward to the results. But only the king and queen's faces were not very happy, there seemed to be something wrong inside. The time to announce the results is close, only a few minutes left, and the beautiful girls will know who the prince is. In the strangely dignified atmosphere, time seemed to stand still to prolong the competition. Suddenly, a boy about twelve years old in his hand, holding a pot of earth, ran quickly in, cried and knelt down, and said to the king:

- I obeyed the king's orders to receive the seed, then I bought a beautiful dragon pot, chose the best soil and the most decomposed fertilizer, and put the seeds in. Every day I diligently need to water and take care, but only weeds and no flowers at all. The boy said while crying hu! Hu!

At this moment, thunder and lightning began to rumble, as if signaling something very special. Indeed, God does not harm honest people. The king was so happy that he announced that:

- This baby is the future prince I am looking for.

The King's announcement made all the judges of the Beauty Contest, and everyone was startled. Especially the parents of the children participating in the beautiful flower contest to choose the prince, before the king's announcement surprised everyone, and at the same time booed against the king's decision.

The order committee asked everyone to keep order and be quiet to listen to the king's judgment. At this time, the king slowly explained:

- I open a beautiful flower contest to deliberately choose someone who knows how to live honestly, and never cheats on anyone so that later this king can help people settle down and live happily in the spirit of love, and solidarity, and help each other.

Now I declare the truth:

- These flower pots are beautiful, but this beauty is obtained from the lies of the contestants.

At this point, the king suddenly stopped to wait and see how everyone's reaction was. But the atmosphere of the flower festival was different now, and all returned to silence to listen to the king's explanation:

- Before the seeds are given to the contestants, I have all boiled them, so there are no beautiful flower pots like this.

That's why I say the flower pots of all the contestants are fake, only this boy who knows how to live honestly deserves to be chosen by me as a prince, and I will cede the throne to become the King. Myself, in my spare time, I study the Buddha's teachings so that I can practice for the rest of my life.

Through the above story to let you know, honesty is a good quality that shows personality in your own life, always bringing people unlimited joy. Sincere words and actions are the best substance for life. This material does not cost you money or energy, but it brings many benefits and makes the listener comfortable, and encouraged, and makes the relationship between you and others more intimate.

Bitter medicine heals illness, truth hurts the heart. On the other hand, in life, there are harsh words from straight people, but they only have good intentions to want you to correct them. Seeing your mistake, and how sincere and precious it is, are true words that offend the listener. Meanwhile, there are words that are sweet, pleasing to the ear, and very pleasing to you, but those are lies and flattery, that do not do you any good. Those are the deadly sweet words of the cunning and deceitful. Therefore, in speech, it is necessary to be sincere, unselfish, and not self-serving to achieve success in communication. Therefore, every day of your life, you should know how to choose beautiful words or ideas to say, in accordance with human ethics, towards the noble meaning of words, to enrich the beauty of the love of humanity.

To achieve the emotions in words, you need to know how to control negative emotions such as Shortness, anger, yelling, and shouting, especially towards your loved ones. And another very important thing is that you should think carefully before saying what you think, see if it is appropriate for the situation at that time, to avoid hurting others.

Of course, you shouldn't tell each other lies. On the contrary, you need to speak honestly to each other with an understanding and loving heart. When you live honestly, you are a person who always respects the truth, respects the right to live upright, is honest, and courageously accepts mistakes when you make mistakes and tries to correct them. Living honestly helps you to improve your dignity, strengthen your social relationships, and will be trusted and respected by everyone.

 A thoughtless word is likened to adding fuel to the fire, igniting anger, and destroying all brotherhood. Moreover, in your life, each person has a personality, and each person has lifestyle. Everyone has a different way of saying it, so it is difficult to avoid all the conflicts, frustrations, and sorrows. Sometimes you are the one who causes suffering and trouble for others just by words that are thoughtless before and after. Sometimes you just want to speak for what you think is the pleasure of your mouth, but you don't care about the pain of others, because your words just came out. Therefore, smiling on the lips is essential in life, it always brings joy to many people. Based on other people's words and expressions, you can know what part of their mind is wanting. To be loved and respected or despised and hated, in large part because of your tongue and words. Thus, the tongue has played an important role in shaping the prestige and value of each person.

Therefore, you need to know how to think carefully in your speech, to avoid unfortunate misunderstandings, which cause pain to others. You use words as a means of connecting love, helping you to understand and draw closer together. Aware of the importance of words, you should speak truthfully, and those words are always praised by the sages.

      The story above is practical proof in life that you need to try to learn and imitate. As you have seen the boy thanks to knowing how to live honestly without lying, dared to hold a flower pot without flowers to come before the King to present the truth. In life, who does not want to be in a high position, especially in the beautiful flower contest, the purpose is to choose a prince, which is the highest dream of everyone in the world. Having both a beautiful wife and a future king who doesn't like it. Because of that greed, the contestants all have to cheat to have beautiful flower pots. This king is choosing a virtuous man to inherit in the future, that is the only way to find the person he wants. So living honestly is a noble virtue indispensable in your life. Once everyone lives honestly with each other, and everyone is aware of that, then this world will be a paradise of happiness.

In short, telling the truth is best, when a precept is taught by the Buddha not to lie, it is very important for life not only for cultivators but for all people in this world. So you must always remember this teaching to never lie.

However, the world you live in is not a model world, life does not follow a single direction, it is variable and diverse. Knowing that lies are not good, can be harmful to yourself, but sometimes, in a certain position, in a certain situation, lying is really necessary. If telling the truth puts you in a dangerous situation and the only way to be safe is to lie, then even if your brain is damaged, you still have to use dishonest words

And despite the mental stress and physical fatigue that surround you when you lie, telling the truth is still not an option in this time of need. However, while lies are sometimes necessary, you can still find plenty of reasons, to tell the truth. Before you speak or make decisions about your actions, remember to weigh politeness against your own interests. That means you can't always tell the truth, but the more you tell the truth, the healthier your body and mind will feel.

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